Why do Abusers Abuse!???!???

Posted on October 30, 2009. Filed under: Abuse, Double Standards, Life, Men, My 2 Cents, Problems, Relationship | Tags: , |

This has always been a topic that I wondered about. I’ve always wondered why men abused women existed and why there were women in the world that stayed in abusive relationships. First and Foremost, let me say that I don’t think it’s right for a woman to hit a man, or vice versa, but this post is geared towards all the male abusers out there and reading this post right now…

Me and My Mr. always have arguments about these sorts of topics. His claim to fame is that “A woman needs to stay in her place and she won’t have to worry about it.” I always say, “What is a woman’s place?? I have never come across ANY  reason why a man can talk sh&t, get in a womans face and a woman can’t do the same. I see no sense in that. I am a firm believer in the notion that everyone’s created equally. I have never prayed on any one simply because they seemed more fragile and more weak than I. That is cruel and doesn’t help me feel better about myself at all. If anything I try to uplift the “weak” so they won’t be taken advantage of by the next person that comes along. Anywho, I never understood why and when men thought it was OK to hit women. Was there a newsflash that I didn’t hear about?? I would think that hitting women would make you feel like less of a man, considering we’re supposed to be the more “fragile” of our species. It seems just a little too easy and the pattern that I have observed in abusers is one where they are always afraid of other confronting men that may cross the abusers path. So is it that they feel weak in the world and feel like letting out all of their anger and frustrations from that out on someone weaker than themselves? It seems that men are supposed to be our protectors but when we need protection from them, what happens then?

I know lots of outsiders (people looking into  an abusive relationship) would say, “why not call the police and why not just leave!?” However, sometimes it just isn’t that easy. Most of the time along with physical abuse comes emotional abuse and a very genuine fear of what will happen if they take these next steps. Especially when your fear for your family and/or your children.

I want men to know this and hear THIS if nothing else, there are many alternatives to hitting your lady. This should never even come across the mind as an option. When me and My Mr. are in the midst of arguing and I feel like it’s going too far, I usually just leave, cool off and maybe talk about it later.

—A few things to relieve stress to let go of Tension.

– Work Out

– Take up Boxing, or another Sport.

– Go Smoookke. (For all you smokers out there).

-Try to look at yourself as if you are out of the moment and in the room, what would your mother say?! What would you say if you were looking at yourself?

-When you feel the tension building, leave. Get in the car and go!

I want to talk a bit about the predatory side of abusing.  There are certain men out there that prey on a specific type of woman. There are men on Earth that enjoy beating on women. These are the types of guys that I never want to get involved with, meet, or even know. There is something really degrading and disheartening about the fact that a man will take his frustrations out on his wife or his woman, “the woman he’s supposed to love.” I do think there are men out there that get enjoyment out of someone else’s fear of them. I believe they crave and love that cycle of abuse, forgiveness, abuse and then again forgiveness. I guess that’s why these reality show brains came up with shows like “Snapped,” where women end up killing their husbands because they have been abused repeatedly until the point they are scared for their life and just can’t take it anymore. These women feel the only way to end their misery is to end their abusers life. That’s another thing, sometimes these women are so scared of their men they feel the only way to defend themselves is to resort to shooting, or killing their “victim” while in sleep mode or otherwise not aware of what’s going on.

I swear, abuse is a powerful thing. I know there are many aspects about this subject that I don’t know. I have done a little reading on the subject but nothing too extensive. I was just thinking about it and wanted to express my opinions on the topic.

Have any of you ever been in an abusive relationship? What came of it?

What if you found out the person you love is an abuser (emotional or physical), would you tell someone? Would you honestly try to leave?

What do you think about the women that end of killing their abusive husbands??

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Sorry you Guys, but i’m back now!!!

Posted on October 28, 2009. Filed under: A Day Off Work, Problems, Rants, Vixen Tells | Tags: |

I am so sorry to all of the people that follow my site, or even visit me and have been waiting on new content. My internet has been down for a long time, and then I was in the process of moving back and forth from Oakland to Stockton, CA.

I haven’t had much time to post with all the things going on in my life right now, but I promise to do better!!

Thanks to the people that have still been visiting my site!!!

—Just wanted to Apologize!

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Kanye’s Apology on Jay Leno.

Posted on September 15, 2009. Filed under: Career, Life, Problems, Random, Vixen Tells | Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

Ya’ll go easy on him, he’s going through a hard time. You can tell he’s still emotional about his mom’s death and that’s something he may never get over…

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Some Mess for Ya…these people are soooo wrong!!

Posted on September 5, 2009. Filed under: Problems, Random | Tags: , , , , , |

No Explanation Needed….

Now…this is just gross, plus I HATE feet.

Hmm…this Pic is verrrryyy suspect.

….NEVER would I!

C’Mon Now Ladies!!!


well…I guess she’s happy..

…People we have to do better, if you know someone like this please help them out!!!

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Chris Brown Interview… Chris, you might as well have Stayed HOME!

Posted on September 3, 2009. Filed under: Career, Double Standards, Job, Life, Love, Men, My 2 Cents, Problems, Relationship, Women | Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

…this little “spoof” may be a little excessive but it hits on some good points. Chris is trying to gain back his popularity but he will NEVER do so if he doesn’t take responsibility for what he did. This guy is in COMPLETE DENIAL. I have never been the one to tell someone to apologize if they don’t mean it, but in America, right now, he is not being well received. No one is buying his albums. He’s not touring. No one is feeling the Chris Brown that everyone, just a few years ago, couldn’t get enough of. I think people just want Chris to say, “OK. I made a mistake and I was totally wrong for putting my hands on a woman, especially a woman that I love.”

He’s doing everything in his power to NOT do that and it’s really backfiring. Rihanna has moved on with her life and he’s stuck in this vicious loop that he’s NOT going to get out of unless he explains to America what was going through his head. Everyone saw the pictures of what he did and for him to say he doesn’t remember?? It’s unacceptable.

…and furthermore, what I thought was the craziest part of the interview was when they aired his prior apology. When they aired it, Chris started “laughing,” he really just had a little smirk on his face.

I really couldn’t believe that! I know he was trying to hold in it but it was evident that he found it humurous!

Even though everyone knows that apology was fake, he really just proved it and i’m surprised that that portion of the interview hasn’t turned into a huge deal. After that I really didn’t even want to watch the Interview anymore, but of course I did && TIVO’d it. Lol.

**So…Everybody let me know what you think about this situation?

Does he need to own up to what he did or should everyone just forget about this?

Are there more important things going on? Do you think his career will be the same?

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Texting while Driving!? How Deadly is it really!??

Posted on August 26, 2009. Filed under: Life, Problems, Random | Tags: , , , , , |

**Texting while Driving Video**
— This is a PSA video on the subject. This video has received a lot of controversy on how graphic it is, but I think it’s doing a little too much. Seems too staged, but it does make you think. This could happen as a result of texting…but just a little over the top…..

I know I and many (if not all) of my friends are guilty of doing this. Your phone starts ringing and you just feel like you have to answer the call or text. Ever since I’ve had a phone I have both texted and talked while I was behind the wheel. The only time that I didn’t do it was while my mom was in the car.

Texting and talking while driving, I believe is something that people don’t think is a big deal. It goes back to that invincibility. Humans believe they can do just about anything and the outcome won’t be bad. People take lots of things for granted & driving is one of them. I know i’m a guilty party as well, so i’m not trying to sound all “holier than thou.” People don’t really regret things that they’ve done until it’s too late.

So, I guess people started banding together in support of the No talking while Driving Rule which took effect a couple of months ago. When this rule surfaced, I really thought it was kind of stupid. I mean, I knew it wasn’t going to stop anyone from talking on the phone regardless of the fact that they are operating a motor vehicle. If you can’t stop people from answering their phone in a movie theatre, you definitely can’t stop them in their own car, UNLESS there is a police officer driving past.

What I can’t understand though, is, if it’s sooooo unsafe, WHY ARE POLICE OFFICERS STILL DOING IT!?!? But that’s neither here nor there. That’s another subject all together.

Recently, they just decided that texting should also be banned. Now, even though I do both, I KNOW that texting while driving is VERY VERY unsafe and no one should do it but I only have control over myself, so recently I have stopped. I just don’t wanna take that risk anymore. They should have banned texting a long time ago. I believe that talking should still be allowed. Bluetooths can’t really  help the situation. You can still be too much into your conversation that you are not too much paying attention to what you are doing but i’m not the law either…so, like I said, I can only change me.

So tell me what you guys think about the whole “Texting while Driving” video and your thoughts on the situation.
Do you text and talk while driving?

Do you care if it’s unsafe?

 Why do you think Americans love their phones so much?

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Sorry, but I HAD to do this. This is unacceptable!

Posted on August 25, 2009. Filed under: Hair, Problems, Random | Tags: , , , |

Man, if you ever decide to let your dreads get THIS raggedy you should definitely look into a different type of hairstyle. This is a waste of hair. Sorry to judge, but this is a definite



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…and the plot THICKENS!!! Ryan, “Megan wants a Millionaire” found DEAD!

Posted on August 25, 2009. Filed under: Life, My 2 Cents, Problems, Relationship | Tags: , , , , , , |

As E! Online is reporting…



The manhunt for murder suspect Ryan Jenkins is officially over. Canadian police found the former reality star dead in a hotel room the afternoon of August 23rd, E! News confirmed.

Authorities have not yet released an official cause of death, but police say the 32-year-old died of an apparent suicide. He reportedly hung himself.

Royal Canadian Mounted Police found his body in a motel room in Hope, British Columbia, a town 84 miles east of Vancouver.

The death ends an international manhunt for the “Megan Wants a Millionaire” finalist, who fled to his native Canada on foot last week.

“The sadness of all this is that Mr. Jenkins will not be standing before an Orange County jury for his crime,” Buena Park Police Lt. Steve Holliday said in a press conference last night.

Jenkins was charged in the gruesome murder of his ex-wife, former swimsuit model Jasmine Fiore, after her body was found stuffed in a suitcase inside of a trash bin on Aug. 15. Fiore, 28, was missing her teeth and fingers.

Jenkins, who met and married Fiore within the span of just a few weeks this spring, quickly moved from “person of interest” to person charged with murder.

It’s a tag his death may not relieve.

“I do believe he participated in the murder,” Holliday said. “Because there’s additional information we’re following up on, I can’t expand any further than that.”

Holliday added that Jenkins’ vehicle is a “key piece of evidence in this investigation,” but declined to confirm reports that Fiore was killed in the car.

“We’re lucky to have that car. And we would love to have seen Ryan Jenkins stand before an Orange County jury.”

**My 2 Cents**

I really don’t know exactly how I feel about this situation but I do feel that the media and world were way too quick to judge this man. The only thing they are/were saying is that Fiore && Jenkins were having problems. The last time that I checked having problems in a relationship doesn’t automatically mean that he killed her. Yes, maybe he could have been extremely upset, but at the same time Fiore was a model && there could have been people in her life that she did wrong, there could be other people that want to hurt her or maybe she just met the wrong person on the wrong night.

I think once the police have a theory in their mind there is really no getting around it. The fact that he “committed suicide” (allegedly) would probably make someone think that he is guilty for sure, but I think that we will never know. I mean, Jenkins was about to become a little famous, as famous as a Reality Show can make someone. He was stealing the show && Megan’s heart from the beginning..

However, don’t get me wrong. I’m not defending him, I don’t know either party. I don’t know what happened either but there should be further investigation && I know that there will be some, so when I find another article on the happenings I will definitely post them here…

Thanks for visiting my blog — The Queen.

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Ryan, “Megan wants to be a Millionaire.” Possible murder suspect!?!?

Posted on August 19, 2009. Filed under: Life, Men, Problems, Relationship | Tags: , , , , |

*** UPDATE ***
As of right now VH1 will not be airing the new show that was scheduled for tonight. I don’t know how long this will last but i’m kinda disappointed…not really.

As Huffington Post is reporting…


A body that was found stuffed in a suitcase and thrown in an Orange County trash bin has been identified as that of a 28-year-old former swimsuit model who disappeared over the weekend.

Police said Tuesday that Jasmine Fiore had been strangled.

Lt. Gary Worrall says police want to speak with Ryan Alexander Jenkins, of Alberta, Canada, who reported her missing Saturday night after he reportedly took her to a poker party in San Diego the night before.

Ryan Alexander Jenkins is a contest on “Megan Wants a Millionaire” as of know also, Megan has taken a liking to him and it has been rumored that he won the show, but that has NOT been confirmed by ANYONE as of yet.


Los Angeles police investigators realized Monday evening that the description of the body found Saturday morning in Buena Park matched the description of Fiore given by her mother.

Fiore had recently moved to Los Angeles from Las Vegas and had appeared in an ad for Howard Stern’s radio show.


According to TMZ…

A friend of Jasmine’s says Fiore was planning to take her Vegas trip the day before her body was found.

And, the woman who was the roommate of Fiore and Jenkins tells TMZ Jenkins told her last Sunday — the day after Jasmine’s body was discovered — he was “done with the relationship,” that “he couldn’t take it anymore” and he was going to Vegas.

The roommate also says Jenkins — who appeared on the VH1 reality show “Megan Wants a Millionaire” — called her last Saturday night and said, “I should have known something was up when she said she was going to run errands and left with all of our packed suitcases in our car.”

Jasmine’s body was found stuffed in a suitcase and thrown in a dumpster in Orange County, CA last Saturday.

Both the roommate and the friend say that Fiore and Jenkins met at a Hawaiian Tropic event in Vegas. And Playboy says Fiore worked as a promo model for a “Girls of Golf” event one time 4 years ago and hasn’t worked for Playboy since.

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